I'm Not Her

July 1, 2011

Gr 7-10-It's hard for Tess not to be jealous of her older sister. Kristina is beautiful; she's popular and outgoing, with a promising volleyball career. When Kristina is diagnosed with an aggressive form of bone cancer and must undergo chemotherapy, their mother's desire to keep up appearances makes Tess's life even more painful. Her mother throws parties and goes shopping to avoid dealing with the reality of Kristina's illness. Her dad spends all of his time at work and her sister slips into depression. In the meantime, Tess is trying to keep up her grades and create a piece of artwork to submit to a contest that could lead to a scholarship to her dream school. Tess's transformation is subtle, believable, and satisfying. The author seamlessly develops complexity in all of the characters as they all respond differently to their grief. Tess's former best friend seems to gloat at Kristina's diagnosis, while the kids in the popular crowd, whom Tess had previously dismissed, reach out to Tess, and her former academic rival, Clark Trent, becomes her protector at school. Tess's journey is both rewarding and painful as she develops the courage to stand up to her parents to break them out of their denial and she begins to appreciate her own beauty and strength. This quick and heartbreaking read realistically shows how one person's illness affects an entire community.-Rachael Myers-Ricker, Horace Mann School, Bronx, NY

Copyright 2011 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

June 1, 2011
Grades 9-12 Tess is definitely not like her older sister, Kristina. Tess is shy, socially awkward, and an aspiring artist; Kristina is a popular and beautiful volleyball player. But when Kristina is diagnosed with an aggressive form of bone cancer, Tess finds herself attracting a lot of attentionfrom the populars, even from some cute boys. She puts up a front, but the reality is that Kristina is very sick and could lose her leg. Tess really doesn't know how to talk to Kristinaor their parentsabout how she feels and what she fears. The only one who seems to know how to relate to Kristina is Jeremy, whose own mother is battling breast cancer. Rich in characterization, Gurtler's novel wrestles with some serious issues and explores different means of coping (or escaping) yet manages not to be overwhelming or bleak. Just right for fans of Sarah Dessen and Jodi Picoult, this is a strong debut that attempts to answer the question, What does it really mean to live?(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2011, American Library Association.)